Having a rough time in my marriage at the moment. I've done a lot of work to know my triggers, know my limits, and my partner became supportive once they understood just what OCPD actually means. But now it feels like I'm stuck in a position where anything tense in the relationship is blamed on me, and I've taken to squelching any of my own pet peeves or concerns in case my OCPD is making me irrational.

 

But then my legitimate issues, about how my partner treats me, even though I know I can be frustrating, get lumped into and blamed on my "black and white thinking." I feel like I've lost any credibility about genuine issues I have with my partner because everything gets blamed on OCPD. Blamed on me.

 

I feel like I'm doing all the changing and hard work in the relationship now and my partner gets to skate by not taking responsibility for their own shortcomings or irrational thinking. Anyone can be irrational and frustrating, not just people with OCPD.

 

Whenever I search the internet for "OCPD and relationships" it's all just articles about how to deal with an OCPD partner, but there's nothing about how to deal with a non-ocpd partner. So, just feeling a bit frustrated and helpless. Thanks for reading.